Just... Not... Today.

Well, its Saturday nite and I'm here, in front of the monitor and writing. This is for you. You, the only you that make me feel a sensation of love or Idk what it is called. Maybe its useless if I keep writing, but dunno, just want. I know, I realize, its my fault, its me, who didn't know about your condition. Its me, who want you to care the most, Its me who want you to bla bla bla and bla bla bla to make bla bla bla. Too much desire. I mean my OWN desire, not yours. Maybe you have one, but I didn't realize. No, no its not you who didn't considerate, its me. Well I know, now, we are not in the same world, I know, really, I do. And I know this is just a wishful thinking that we might be in the same world (again), just wish, ignore it. You have a new spirit now, you have the new me, oh no no, you'll never have a new me, maybe hmm what its called, you have eeee the new thing that feeling your heart, each day. Ya maybe that phrase is more suitable. Hmm ya, S, I will always pray for your life. Hm, just know, I'm still there, ya, in our place hahaha I mean in your and my place, ya you know "us" is no more longer. I just, don't know how to say, well, I'm okay with this I mean yea I'm okay if you don't realize that I'm here, its ok, thats your choice. Its ok, I'm ok. I will be single-minded ehehe like you, but just not today maybe tomorrow or the other day the other year, I don't know, just not today like you did. No, actually, whenever you want to come home and explain everything, I'll listen. Ya, you know, thats just an if clause. And it seems like won't happen. Ya, too much day-dreaming, too much wishful thinking, too much that too much hahaha hmm congratulations hey you for forgetting me ehehehe its not I can't forget you but I don't want to forget you. Well, I've read those in your diary, and thank you then ehehe I'm glad to know that I crossed your mind for a sec, even for a sec to wrote those, yea, I'm glad. Thats it. Eeee you know, I still collect that little pieces of our memories eeee I mean your and my memories. Oh shit, I miss you, mas Radith.


well, I wish that we will be together, build up the love together, in the other place, someday... Yea, someday..